Are you afraid to be GREAT?
Is your self-doubt forcing you to play small?
Last Friday I had lunch with a great lady – Els. She has been an entrepreneur for ages, 25 year or so. And a successful one.
Recently she has decided to start a new business. I just love ladies like her. Successful, ready to take a risk, going for it, ready for the next level…. My ideal clients!
While we were talking about her new business adventures, we talked about positioning herself, i.e. Personal Branding. We looked at her mission statement, her logo, website… brilliant. She has put some thought in it, that’s for sure.
And we discussed blogging. “I will write a blog post every fortnight – I already have plenty ideas – I already have a name for my blog…. But somehow I’m not ready to write yet”. That struck me. Why? She’s used to writing, so what’s keeping her from writing her blog posts?
Here are some ideas:
- “Will it be good enough?”,
- “Will people read it?”,
- “My ideas are not really original”, and
- “Who am I to write about this?”
Strange huh – such a successful woman and still doubts?
NOPE – not strange at all – this is perfectly normal.
Everybody has this inner critic – you know, that voice that’s trying to keep you in your comfort zone, that voice who doesn’t want you to change because it wants to keep you safe.
It’s a nice voice in the sense that it wants to keep you from taking risks and failing. On the other hand, it’s not that nice a voice because it tells you foolish false things, it’s too black and white, no nuance and it lies and cheats and is the reason why you are still playing small.
Do you recognize this?
I do – I also have this inner voice telling me that I should work harder, or that people will hate me when I stand out, or that no one will show up at my YouBrandBuilder birthday party.
I have been postponing the date of my YouBrandBuilder birthday party for some strange reason. My YouBrandBuilder launch party was a great success. So why wouldn’t my birthday party be?
You see, everyone has these silly inner voices – you too!
My questions to you:
- What are you afraid of?
- What is your inner critic saying?
- Why aren’t you playing big yet?
- Are you afraid to be visible?
- Are you afraid to blog? Or worse, make video blogs?
- Are you afraid people will laugh at you?
- Are you afraid you will put your family at risk when starting a new business adventure?
- And if you are already playing big, what’s your secret of success? 🙂
I recently started reading the book “Playing Big” by Tara Mohr. Even though she is focusing on women, I believe men can also learn a thing or two (about women amongst others? :-))
Anyway, here are the tips she gives us to bust your inner critic:
- Get to know your inner critic – what does it say? “Nobody is interested in your stupid party”
- Give it a name – you could call it “the serious loser” or Peter Pan or so (have some fun with it – one of my favorite mottos: don’t take yourself too seriously)
- Recognize your critic when it shows up – “I’m hearing the serious loser telling me I will make a fool of myself organizing this party…”
- Remove it from the scene – one of my acquaintances (my hairdresser actually) used to lie awake at night worrying about a lot of things. Now, however, before he goes to sleep, he imagines himself putting all the worries in a little box that will not open before the next morning. Crazy huh? But it works, he says. Should try it.
- Don’t be angry with your inner critic – it wants to keep you safe. So “thank you serious loser, but I have everything under control. The party will be great, trust me.”
- Use humor – your inner critic is panicky, irrational, and silly. Just laugh at it and laugh it off
- Check it out – is what your inner critic is saying really true? Is there proof? Does it serve my mission and goals if I listen to the inner critic “Will my party be a disaster? No it will not”
So next time you are facing something challenging like
- starting a new business,
- getting out there,
- becoming more visible,
- writing your articles,
- going to network events,
- launch a new website,
- go online etc….
Just call me, and I’d be happy to help you wherever I can 🙂 +32.478.39.02.69 or firstname.lastname@example.org
Or just remember the 7 steps I just described above.
And in the meanwhile
SAVE THE DATE:
October 29, 2015 I’ll throw my YouBrandBuilder Birthday Party and you are invited WOOHOO 🙂
And it will be interesting, fun and wow! All righty!